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KATHERINE SHEERS

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Undercurrent – exhibition

 Posted on May 21, 2018

 

The following exhibition text accompanies Katherine’s latest show Undercurrent, opening tonight. 

‘Last year something in me broke. Following the premature birth of my youngest daughter I developed severe postnatal depression. Inhabiting the imperfection of motherhood, intimately aware of the raw vulnerability of the body and self, I surrendered to a humbling lack of control. Drawing with my daughter held close to my body, her presence began to direct the marks I made – both literally as I used my hands interchangeably to smudge pastels and dip feathers into ink to strike the page, and figuratively as her weight and warmth against my chest led me to draw from a place of love. During the making of this work I’ve experienced a willingness to carry and be carried – I don’t feel wholly responsible for the figures that have emerged, but I do wish to honour their fragile flesh and serpentine emotions.’

Katherine Sheers

‘The works in Undercurrent trace emotions and ideas of the self through layers of drawn lines. Impressions left by the bodies and by the body of work as a whole are somehow both direct as well as hidden. No one word befits the interpretation of any image, and through the repetition that is integral to Sheers’ practice, her subjects live freely beneath their fluid rhythm and surface: undefined and complex.’

Sarah Boulton (Slade School of Fine Art – curator of Undercurrent)

Posted in ExhibitionsTagged Art, Drawing, Exhibition, Life Drawing

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  • I see you... I See You. Someone said these words to me recently. I didn’t ask for them, they were generously offered, and in hearing them, I felt a palpable shift of energy and release of tension from my body. 

Sometimes, we don’t need anyone to do things for us, we simply need someone to notice all we are doing ourselves. 

And that is exactly what I’ve been needing. 

Contrary to what my recent silence on this account might suggest, I haven’t been quietly absorbed in daily life. I’ve been riding a clunky rollercoaster of trying to launch a new online gallery @torncontemporary whilst recovering from a case of Covid.

To be frank, Covid floored me. In hindsight, I’d been ignoring my body’s calls for rest and tenderness. Only when an ambulance had to be called did I give in - I postponed the gallery launch, rested more, worked less, began to find my way back. 

I’m humbly trying to accept things the way they are rather than the way I’d envisioned them being. TORN is not yet launched, though it’s close. My body is recovering, but feels softer and more tired than I’m used to.

But today, as I stepped into my studio and allowed my eyes to wander over the surface of this painting (still in progress), I felt that sensation in my heart space which signals relief; a sense that things are exactly as they’re meant to be. 

That’s pretty much what I felt when that beautiful soul @sonia_pang told me she saw me. “It’s okay” my being whispered “It’s all okay.”

May you be seen too x
  • Setting her free! Some of you will know, most of you won’t, I spent a year and a half of my teenage years confined to wearing a Milwaukee back brace. 

Somewhat akin to a medieval stretching rack, it held my torso rigid for 23 out of every 24 hours. I quickly adopted a level of self-consciousness so acute that it far surpassed the pain felt by my body. Hoping to make the hulk of plaster and metal less noticeable to my peers, I begged the doctors to bend the steel bars so they fitted closer to my chest and back. The resulting pressure points gave me bruises which refused to fade for months after I stopped wearing the brace. 

Then, aged 14, I was free of it. My hopelessly curvy spine refused to play ball and stand to attention as spines are meant to - I was advised to have spinal fusion surgery. For better or worse, I defiantly threw away the surgeon’s business card. I no intention of letting anyone else mess with my body. A decision made in anger, rebellion and a deep hunger for freedom. Freedom for my body and freedom of choice. 

This painting, ‘Your Beautiful Spine’ (soon to be added to the soon to be launched @torncontemporary) had been stretched tight and rigid on this board for over a year. 

Today I set her free, smiling as I did so. 

A moment of liberation, no matter how small, is a moment for quiet celebration. Reminding us, as it can, of the greater experiences of freedom we have known and, hopefully, will come to know.
  • Thinking back to the early morning light which made this painting blush. No filter, just nature doing her job as the ultimate colourist, before the artwork set off for a new home amongst the cherry blossom of Japan. {For context, you can see the ‘actual’ colours in the second image.}⠀
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As the weather here turns towards an early autumn and the light begins to cool, I already feel a soft longing in my stomach for the warmth of light and of temperature that are (sometimes) inherent in a British summer. ⠀
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I grew up in South East Asia, near to the jungles of Borneo. I joke that an early childhood spent in the tropics set my own temperature too high for this British climate - my body desires warmth. As I start layering up clothes now, I think that maybe there is truth in that joke.
  • My dear friends, there’s something I want to tell you and today feels like the appropriate day to do so.

This year has cemented my knowing that creating art is my life-long love. I’m in it for the long haul and I hope I’m lucky enough to be painting on my last day on earth. BUT being able to continue this artistic life relies, in part, on being able to share my work with others. This is true of most artists, I don’t walk this path alone. 

Covid kinda screwed that up.

My exhibitions were cancelled, so too were the exhibitions of many of my peers, diminishing our ability to share our art with others. A few months ago, I decided to do something about that.

I’m now the founder of TORN Contemporary, a new online gallery dedicated to works of art on paper, launching next month. 

It’s starting small and I have big plans for it - I live for the artistic curiosity and challenge and joy that I experience and share with other artists. And my hope for the gallery, is that beyond giving artists a platform to show and sell their artwork, it will also become a window into the artistic world for all those who are curious to look in. 

The gallery launches next month and my dear friends, if you’d be willing to follow @TORNcontemporary, sign up to the newsletter (link in the gallery profile) and share it with your friends, you would be giving me a great gift for which I am truly grateful. 

TORN has also partnered with the amazing @onetreeplanted, but that’s a story for another time ☺️🌱

Oh, and why tell you this today? Apparently it’s World Entrepreneur Day...who knew?! 🤷‍♀️
  • A new colour study for a new commission. It’s early days for this painting; the primed canvas doesn’t have a single brushstroke on it. But I’m relishing working with the woman who’s commissioned it. ⠀
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Sharing openly and vulnerably about who she is and what her hopes are for how the finished painting will make her feel, has given me rich opportunity to understand and feel connected to her. ⠀
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That’s a beautiful place to paint from!⠀
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Commissioned artworks can sometimes veer towards rigidity. In great contrast, this woman has given me one of the best gifts you can give an artist...trust. Her willingness to allow the painting to evolve and ‘become’ (even if that means it moves away from initial composition and colour studies) is what, I hope, will allow it to embody all that she wants it to. ⠀
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Now it’s my turn to walk the talk and trust the painting to become what it’s meant to be.
  • She’s not yet finished. Nor am I. There are many parallels between life and art, but perhaps this is one aspect in which they diverge. 

There’s a neatness to a work of art in progress. Not the work itself of course; this stage is seldom neat and never (by its very nature), resolved. But an artwork that needs more (or less) doing to it, can so conveniently be turned around and forgotten about until the time is right to address it with fresh eyes.

Adding layers of paint to this piece today, I found myself wondering...

“Wouldn’t that be something?! If we could hit pause on ourselves when we get angry or feel hurt, when we react to a situation out of deep, unseen patterning, rather than responding to the truth of the moment.”

Thinking about all the messy, unresolved aspects of my self that I’ve come to observe and begin untangling, how much easier that would have been to deal with as I deal with the awkward stages of a painting.

Okay, I’m not sure I’d actually WANT to turn away from myself and come back weeks later to evaluate with fresh eyes. But wow, would it be easier to see the truth of who we are and how we are (re)acting without gazing at ourselves through glasses fogged by emotion and outdated stories!
  • Early layers of under painting in the studio today. Somersaulting from my usual dark on light beginnings, this new painting is working pale tones onto a deep, berry background. ⠀
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It seems incredible how a shift in order can demand a thorough relearning of what I thought I knew; favourite hues behave differently dark upon light, light upon dark. What exists beneath insists on becoming a part of the layers on top and my preferred, subtle, trasparent glazes no longer create the magic I’m used to; I find myself instead needing to reach for unfamiliar, bold, opaque colours. ⠀
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Much like the Shadow work I’ve begun to delve into for my own personal development, I feel somewhat out of control and completely uncertain about what the outcome of this painting might look like. And for once, I’m starting to enjoy that chaos 🤷‍♀️💜
  • Do you see me? #challengeaccepted my beautiful friend @nickyc_om. To the women in my life, past and present, who’ve raised me and raised me up, who’ve shown me what power and grace look like, who’ve taught me love and kindness and resilience, to all those women, I see you. I see you. I see you.
  • Early morning studio visit to look with fresh eyes, at what came into being yesterday (detail of new work in progress).⠀
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Saying a little, feeling a lot 🤍 {Edit: Just an hour later and these colours have warmed with the sun. It’s as if they’ve absorbed hope).
  • My emotions have been charged this week. I’ve meditated, journaled, tried to see where I can take responsibility, attempted to embrace an uncomfortable situation as an opportunity to learn and grow. ⠀
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It was only sitting down to work on this new painting today, that I realised I’d been doing all of that in the quiet hope it would make the feelings go away. It didn’t. I did gain some valuable insight, but I still felt the emotions I didn’t particularly want to feel. ⠀
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I sat in front of the easel, patiently mixing buttery oil paints and in the silence of my studio, I allowed myself to surrender to the humbling humanity of feeling angry and hurt. ⠀
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I’ll just say it; I have “ugly” feelings too; the ones that aren’t reflective of my spiritual beliefs or aspirations. They’re not pretty, they don’t feel great and I’d quite like to live in a world where they didn’t exist. But really, I know that’s just my very human desire to avoid pain. ⠀
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So, taking a deep breath, I allowed myself to feel what I felt. And I painted. And it was simple and honest, and once more I was reminded of how much I adore art for asking me to be exactly where I am, no matter how imperfectly human that place might be.
  • I’m back! 👋 Well, that break was a little longer than planned, but I feel good for it. Restored and hungry to be in the studio, which I am today, working on this; a detail from a new large painting, which two weeks ago was an old large painting that didn’t please me. ⠀
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I’ve been freely applying layer upon layer over the original paintwork. At times, what had gone before, shines through alongside what is now. That marriage of past and present makes me excited for what it may become in the future. ⠀
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I’m happy to be back with you all. ⠀
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Also, I’ve been working on a HUGE new project to support myself and other artists I admire. It’s too soon for the big reveal yet, but watch this space, I’ll be telling you first 🤫😘☺️
  • I’ve been taking a break from social media. I’m reading, listening, having conversations, trying to do better and be better. My dear BIPOC friends, I may not always understand, but I will always stand with you. #blacklivesmatters

© Katherine Sheers 2019MINIMAL

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